Sean went to The Saloon

Snip-its (a training video to help hair-cutters give haircuts to children with autism)

          It cannot be denied that most of the autism kids hate to get their hair cut, same thing goes to Sean. The whole process was like a disaster to all of us, especially me. He became out of control and fight, kick, scream. He is very strong. I had to cut it real fast like an expert, and my hubby had to hold him tight. But as a result, worst hairstyle ever...hahahhaha.... Lately, we decided to bring him to the saloon for the 1st time. 4 people have to hold him tight including me. As usual, he screamed and kicked, but worth it, the result is better than I thought.

At the Saloon

Before and after

New Hairstyle

Sean's Bad Day

        It's been a while I didn't write about Sean, he is doing fine now, still hyper as before, nothing much in progress. I've been thinking, where should I start to write. Let's begin with his 2nd Audiology Test which was on 18th September 2012 at General Hospital (GH) Sibu, Sarawak. We went to Bintangor, Sarawak a day earlier, which is on 17th September 2012. The journey from Bintulu to Bintangor was more than 4 hrs driving. At Bintangor, we stayed at my father in law's house which is closer to Sibu (around half an hour or less of driving). We were all tired, and the kids were having slightly flu and cough. I gave them some medicine (flu and cough) once we arrived at my father in law's house. My daughter, Shenna was getting better. But not for Sean. We reached there around 8pm, after gave him medicine, I changed his clothes and he was like usual, still playing around. But he still had running nose which I thought it would be ok after I gave him medicine, but I was wrong...:(...and for the 1st time in my life I was trembling with fear. That night, he was having a hard time to breath, wheezing too. He was crying most of the time, he wanted to sleep but he couldn't because of the hard breathing. I didn't sleep the whole night, too worried to shut my eyes. I was thinking a lot of things, could it be an asthma? (I had an asthma when I was little). Silly me still didn't know what to do. I prayed to God to watch over my son and don't let anything bad happen to him.

          The next morning we brought him to private clinic at Sibu before heading to GH Sibu. The doctor said his lung was infected by bacteria and gave him an injection. After that, we brought him to GH Sibu for his Audiology Test. Of course they couldn't do the test just as I thought, once again the test will be postponed to 12th November 2012. They were concerned about Sean's health, watched his hard breathing led them to send him to emergency. After doing X-ray, the doctor from GH confirmed it was lung infection, and should admitted to the hospital for monitoring. But this was an option, we chose to bring him home because we noticed that every time we brought him to the hospital, he would cry, and this would make his situation getting worse. I was scared the whole day, cried in my heart while watching him, blamed myself for being so careless. But after took some antibiotic given by the doctor, his condition improved and was able to sleep, even though he still had a bit of wheezing.

          That night, after advised by my sister, we decided to bring him for nebulizing at Serikei private clinic. We went there with 2 of my sister in-laws since they knew the doctor well. After nebulization, believe it or not, he was getting better drastically. The next day, his wheezing totally gone. Pity Sean, he must be having a hard time, we met 3 doctors that day, tiring but it's worth it. Thank God for being there for us. Thanks to all my family and friends for being there for me during my hard time.

Video was taken during our way back from GH Sibu to Bintangor (18/9/2012)

At GH Sibu while waiting. (pic shown Sean with his daddy)

He says something!!!

I was very excited when Sean is started to say something, I even post it at my facebook timeline, here. I wrote,

"he said 'BLUE'...???!!....OMG!!!..yes he is saying that blue word!!!...our Sean is saying blue ...omg!!...I can't stop crying ...he is following one of his tablet's app, I installed a lot of autism apps for him, he is learning, all by himself since he doesn't like ppl to interrupt him....and, he answered all of the puzzles n questions correctly ...how he makes it, I don't know ....Thank You God, Praise The Lord...."

He makes me laugh, he makes me cry, he makes me happy, he makes me sad....ohh my life will be empty without him...Thank you God for everything.

Watch this video, it shows the 2nd time he said 'blue' and 'mommy', and also some of his behavior. My camera is always ready to catch those 'happy moment'. I don't want to miss it. Somehow, I realize that he is only repeating the words from us, he still pulls my hand whenever he needs something instead of calling me mommy. I guess he still doesn't know the meanings. But at least all these prove that his ears are in good condition.

Obsession in Scratching

          Sean does a lot of scratching. It's been over a year ago. Normally, he scratches from his head till his both legs, including his back. This causing his skin sores and wounds. He is crying everytime in a bath because of the painful wounds. What I do is, after his bath, keep him dry, apply baby lotion on his whole body, including his back as well. Next, put some powder. He is using Agnesia - it's good for him since he has a very sensitive skin. After that, put on his clothes. Every evening, I'm going to make sure that he is not sweating after his bath. Otherwise, he will end up scratching his body during bed time because of itchiness. Every night, I help him to scratch his back softly until he falls asleep. This is also to prevent wounds that he makes if he scratch by himself, and of course have to make sure that his finger nails is always short.

His wounds are healing

"He is such a picky eater.."

 It cannot be denied that most of the kids with autism are picky eaters, there's no doubt that it's a common phenomenon. This is including my 2yo autistic son, Sean. On my previous post I did mention about how happy I was when he started to eat noodles, but it only last for 1 week. A few days ago, he began to reject it as well. These give me a real headache, I'm worry that he only eats biscuit crackers and milk for his 3 meals, but I keep on searching for another solution on the internet, try to find another menu for him. My mind keeps on thinking what kind of food he probably likes. This is really stressing me, not only me, but also my hubby. Then I read about "Overcoming Feeding Problems in a Child with Autism", here is the link. Kimberly Kroeger-Geoppinger, an assistant pediatrics professor at the Cincinnati Children's Hospital Medical Center. Kroeger says,"Choose a Food That's Similar to Those Your Child Likes Best." But at that time I couldn't think of any, maybe I'm too sick this few days, having a fever and headache, lack of sleep and too tired to think. I feel so guilty >.<. It's always during my difficult time, the solution came naturally. It was last night, my sister in-law stopped by, she bought some corns for us. Of course at first I didn't think about giving it to Sean. But after my hubby cooked some and served it while we relaxing and watching tv at the living room, suddenly our little Sean stared at the corn without blinking his eyes. He began to make sound and jump up and down over and over. As I walked near him, I asked, "Sean, you want some?" His responded by pulling my hand to a plate of corn. Wow!! my heart filled with delight. I put some in his mouth, and HE ASKED FOR MORE. :')...After that, I asked my hubby to cut the corn and put it in a bowl (I was sick ok..hehe) so that I could feed him easily. Guess what, he ate it all. All of us were happy and we rewarded him with hugs and kisses. Including our lovely daughter..LOL..Good job Shenna!!..The next day morning (it's today, 17/8/2012), I cooked corn mix with butter and some rice. I'm glad that he didn't notice the rice in it..lol..He ate it all, well done my son! Another new menu for Sean. I'm still searching for his new food though, let him try a new thing, I know it's hard, but I won't give up. My facebook friend, she is also my classmate, she suggests some good ideas for Sean, which is 'sweet potato' soup, Just boil cuts of it with some water and add a little bit of sugar on the soup. Good source of food cause sweet potato has lots of nutrients. If Sean doesn't like it, I'll mix it with corn. He might loves it. I just ask my hubby to buy some sweet potatoes, I'm so excited to try it tonight for his dinner. Another friend of mine, also my old schoolmate, he suggests that I might have to change his milk to rich-nutrition type. He is right, since Sean is a very picky eater. I have to remind myself to try it step by step for Sean, he might dislike it at first, he is always 'unfriendly' to a new thing, even a new toy. We bought a new bottle for him a week ago, but until today, he still refuses to drink from it, even though I give him everyday. I understand, it's an autism, that's why. Thank God for always be there for us, during our difficult time, thank God for sending His angels as a friend to give me some ideas and suggestions. Thank you my lovely friends for being very supportive, I am always ready for Sean, and Sean, let's make it work together!! Jia You!!..

Meet Sean (autism)

Meet Sean (autism)...

Poster

Create my own poster about Sean...doesn't look like a poster isn't it?..hahaha. ...I enjoy trying though. ..;)......more to come......

It's sad to see him just pass by, he doesn't show any interest in other kids. I'm worrying about his future, how he makes friends, will he be bullied by other kids, is he happy, this kind of questions keeps on playing in my mind.

"My brother is an autistic, but I still love him." - Shenna

       
         My daughter’s name is Shenna Bella Pau. She is 5 years old. She is a funny and talkative little girl with a curious characteristic. She is like most of the girls at her age, likes all the girly stuff such as Barbie dolls, long gowns, shoes with high heels, hair-bands..etc..         

          One day, Shenna played with her 4 years old cousin, Aaron, at our house’s living room. They were playing with Sean’s toy cars and blocks since Shenna's toys are all the girlish dolls, Aaron didn’t like it. As they played, suddenly Sean screamed aloud, and I rushed to see what was going on. They were playing with Sean’s favourite tablet, the only thing that Sean couldn't let go. Aaron started to ask Shenna in Mandarin, “Why he shouts? Can’t he just speak out?” Shenna grabbed the tablet from him instead of answering his questions, and gave the tablet back to Sean. She told Aaron in mandarin, “Don’t ever take that tablet from him, later he kicks your butt, I don’t know ooo.” I was laughing. It was funny ok, the way she spoke. Then, that night she asked me, “Mommy, how come Sean still can’t talk? He is almost as tall as Aaron, but he still can’t talk, why?” I answered her in alarmed, tried the easiest way to explain to her, so that she could understand easily at her age. “Sean is a bit different, he can talk but not now, not yet, its call Autism. That’s why you have to take care of Sean because you are his che che (sister). Play together with him, protect him if mommy and daddy are not around, and teach him how to talk. Who knows he might talk after that. Then everyone would be happy.” She nodded her head and said, “Ok, Shenna is che che, Shenna is a big girl and good girl too.” The next day, I saw three of them were playing together again, but they were not playing with toy car, blocks or tablet. 2 of them were following Sean’s behaviour, flapped their arms and hands, shook their head, and span their body. Shenna turned on some music and they were jumping high with flapping hands, just like a bird. They seem to enjoy that moment very much. I was glad, especially when I saw Sean was very happy and excited. Thanks to my beautiful daughter. I hadn’t realized how much she loved him, how much she tried to protect him in her own way. She tried to include Sean to play together in a group instead of leaving him alone. I am very proud of her.

        That’s the sweetest thing I’ll always remember. Somehow, Shenna can’t run away from being a child with ‘attitudes’, that’s normal and she drives me crazy sometimes. There was a time when they (Shenna and Sean) fight over toys, jealous of each other (especially Shenna), unsatisfied and so on. It’s ok because it’s normal. My hubby and I just have to treat them fairly. We’ll try to explain to Shenna the details about her brother’s autism disorder from time to time, educate her at earlier stage. I know it’s not going to be easy as they grow up, Shenna might feel isolated, a bit perhaps. These are a few things that I need to take note, she used to raise it when she is angry:
1, why always me?
2, why can’t Sean do it by himself?
3, it’s not fair!!
4, he doesn't want to play with me!!
5, why mommy always treat Sean better?
6, Mommy and Sean are bad!!
7, I hate Sean!! (she doesn't mean it)
8, he doesn't answer me when I ask!!

          Actually, this kind of scaring me, I always remind myself to be fair to both. Especially when they fight, I just can’t help myself to stand at Sean’s side. She’ll end up complaining to her daddy. But at least, in her heart, daddy is always her hero. But somehow, I need to learn to be strict to Sean too, fair to both of them, and the most important thing is to avoid ‘The Sibling Problem’. So far, Shenna enjoys handling her responsibilities as Sean’s sister. We are so proud of her. I’m glad to have these 2 kids around. Life would be empty without them, thanks God for everything.

          Read this article about The Sibling Problem of Autistic Kids, here.

Shenna hugs her brother, Sean
but Sean struggles hard to release himself...haha

my lovely kids, Sean and Shenna

Baby Sean 4 months and Shenna age 3

"I can take care of my baby brother." 

Shenna and baby Sean

Sean, less than 1 month, hugged by his sister, Shenna

          Please watch the following video and enjoy. Thank you.

Other story,
Note:
on 4/8/2012, my facebook status wrote, here

"He ate noodle!!!!...our Sean is back, he ate 2 bowls of noodle this morning after for so long...all this while, due to his ASD, he only eat biscuit crackers ..my poor baby, u must be very hungry. ...:"(...I prepare his meal 3 times daily, hoping that he'll eat someday like other normal kids..but somehow he doesn't let me down today...thank God...hoping for better tomorrow and onward..:'')...."

This going to be the happiest day I have to record...and today, 5/8/2012, in the morning, he asks for noodles too...as usual, he grabs my hand and shows me the noodle's packet at the kitchen...Thank You God!!!...:')

Pic taken on 5/8/2012, shows how he enjoys eating noodles...well done son!!

-THE END-

Changes in Arranging Pattern

          2 days ago, there's a little changes in my autistic's son, Sean, the way he arranges his toys. He arranges his wooden rectangle plates into 2 rows instead of 1 like previously. ..I still don't know what does it means, but I'm going to find out. But somehow, he got angry several times before because it wasn't straight enough at 1st, he keeps on arranges it into really straight lines...;)..

All done..;)

-THE END-

The Meltdown (Autism)

          There is nothing amusing about the meltdown. It is every known form of manipulation, anger, and loss of control that a person can muster up to display. It is loud, risky at times, frustrating, and exhausting. It is scary. The best definition is a total loss of behavioral control. The meltdown is a common autistic characteristic feared and dreaded by both caregivers and autistics. It stressed me. I feel so tired, fear, angry, all at once. My 2y6m old autistic son, Sean, has the meltdown whenever he is interrupted by someone, while he is lining up his blocks, or while he is playing with his tablet and suddenly it ran out of battery. During the meltdown, He acts wild, crying and screaming, both legs kicking, banging his head on the wall or floor, throwing his body and rolling on the floor. Sometimes he pulls my hair or my 5yo daughter's hair. Otherwise, he pulls my shirt until it tears off. Other then that, he kicks me at my stomach or face, that's common for me even though it often leaves bruises and bleeding lips on me. I tried to calm him down but he kicked me and pushed me away, doesn't like to be cuddled. It breaks my heart so badly. Hearing the loud screaming of my own child is like killing me deep inside my heart especially when I'd tried my best to calm him down but he still can't stop, as if something pulls him back and leaves him in this uncontrollable behavior. I feel so sorry for him, especially at his age he still doesn't understand the situation. All I can do is just stay by his side and watch him until he stops, my tears falling without realizing it. Blaming myself for not understand his need since he still can't talk yet. But he will stop at a certain point. The whole process is like a nightmare to me. Sometimes, I suddenly woke up at night, I thought I heard him scream, but it's not. it's just a silly dream of mine.

          Raising my autistic son makes me realize that meltdowns are very common in public places. It happens almost all the time when we went for outdoor. This is one of the reason that I can't bring him out by myself. *RAISE MY BOTH HANDS AND SURRENDER* My hubby has to be with us too. I can't imagine what will happen without my hubby around. When the meltdown happens at public places, one of us has to pull him out, wrap his arms and legs from behind and carry him into the car, try to calm him by giving him his favorite snack which is always ready inside the car, turn on the music player and so on. But it's always my hubby dealing with this. Then, I'll make a quick shopping because we need to rush back home. I search some info about how to decrease the meltdowns, for me, the best way is to PREVENT. There is always a solution for every problems or difficulties, I'll always search and learn, and do my best for him.

Here are more information about meltdown, it is different from tantrum.

          This video shows Sean was in the middle of meltdowns. There are a few short videos were taken at different times, and I combine it all become 1 video. Catch your breath and watch.

-THE END-

Lining up blocks and puzzling (Autism)

          Sean, 2y6m, my autistic son. He was diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD). Please read my previous post. Sean likes to line up his blocks, this is a part of his routine. He arranges objects with the same size or same color. At home, we keep our old CDs under the cabinet in the kitchen. It happened when I was busy cooking. I didn't notice when he pulled out all the CDs and arranged it into a very straight line. It surprised me at first. In our house, everyday there's a lining up toys on the floor, and I have to wait until he falls asleep to clean it up. I remember there's one time when we went to the restaurant. Somebody dropped down a box of toothpicks, Sean was walking around, he couldn't sit still even for a while. Well, the toothpicks caught his attention. He picked up the toothpick one by one, and arranged it into a straight line, on the floor. I was a bit disappointed because my phone was running out of battery, couldn't snap his picture though.

          We bought a galaxy tab for him, he likes it very much, especially the puzzling games. He still arranges his blocks but not as frequent as before. He spends a long time playing the tab on his own. He won't let us to touch it though. But, his sister, Shenna, likes to disturb him. They fight over toys, it's good, at least he expresses his emotion. We have to bring his tab with him wherever we go for outing activities. I am always worry if the tab might running out of battery, especially when we are outdoor. He'll go wild. Meltdown at public places seems like a nightmare to me and my husband. Embarrass, panic, furious, stress, exhausted, depress, all this feelings come together. It makes me and my husband fight most of the time about this. But this fighting experiences make us think about it over, make us more understand our little boy's need, this is what we have to deal with, together, until Sean grows up, still a long way to go. Now, here we are, always find solutions to solve our problems about our little boy, and together, we will do the best for him. That's the most important thing. Please watch this video and enjoy. This video put a smile on my face. Love him so much!

-THE END-

Chewing (ASD's symptom)

          My Autistic son, Sean, shows sensory issues by chewing objects. He also shows sensory issues to texture such as blankets, clothes, pillows by rubbing it using his fingers. Talking about chewing objects, he chews almost everything in his grab such as pacifier, straw, paper, clothe, plastic, toy and etc. Otherwise, he'll put his finger in his mouth and play with his saliva. I have to clean him after that. Watch this video (below).   At first, I thought it was only cause by his itchy gums, as my mom used to say so, but it's not. Some children with autism like to chew, These children chew, not because they want to destroy clothing, or other objects, but because they may like or need the sensation that they get by chewing. Here are some tips on how to decrease chewing in children with autism. click here.

Sean likes to chew his pacifier, he chews it most of the time. We have to change his pacifier often, like once a day. Picture shows that we have to keep stock for standby. hehe...

chewing his toy

chew tablet's cover...hmmmm...

-THE END-

ASD symptoms (video)

These are apart of Sean's ASD symptoms,
1, Delay in speech
2, Hand Flapping
3, Appear to be deaf at time
4, Avoid eye contact


-THE END-

"My dad rocks!!!..", Sean...;)

          Recently, I follow some pages about autism on facebook. There is one page which I like the most, it calls "Autism Spectrum Disorder, through my eyes." here. I am not alone, many kids are diagnosed with ASD, just like Sean. Their stories are so touching and sometimes, it makes me cry. There is one post caught my eyes, it's about 'Autism Dads Rock". It's cool.

Screen snap  from "Autism Spectrum Disorder, through my eyes" page

         All this while we only talk about the mothers of autism kids. Now, let's talk about Sean's daddy, Mr. Pau, a tall guy with 'gangster look alike' (ceh!). Tell you what, he is not what you are thinking about. He is a kind and responsible person with gentle heart. This can tell through our kids, they prefer him better which makes me jealous sometimes. He helps me to get through a lot of difficulties. Besides working hard to support us, he also helps me doing house chores and taking care of our kids. Sometimes we do fight from different opinions and views, but it's ok, I can't do it without him though...:)..

Daddy is my best friend

I'll be as tall as daddy one day

"Daddy, I miss you when you go to work everyday, can't wait till you come back. I like it when you lift me up high, it's just like flying up and touch the ceiling. Mommy can't do that ('I know I'm short ok' mom). I love riding on your back, it's fun. I love to eat snack that you bought for me and my sister, che che Shenna. This make mommy angry with 3 of us. I want daddy to bath me everyday, mommy doesn't like it when I play with water and splash the whole room wet. But daddy you would help me to clean all the messes without saying a word. I like you daddy because you don't wear glasses, mommy wears it sometimes and i'm scared (he covers his face if I wear glasses and run away from me). Just ask my daddy whenever my mommy says 'no'. He is cool I know and there's no one on earth can replace him. DADDY, YOU ROCK!!!...We love you daddy." - Sean Bruce Pau -

Watching sunset with daddy

Outing with daddy and che che Shenna

-THE END-

My Son ASD's Symptoms (video)

          This video shows some of my son ASD's symptom. (please read my previous post here). He likes to shake his head to the left and right (repetitive behavior), obsessions towards spinning objects and refuse to change his daily menu (sameness). More videos to come for my next post...;)..please subscribe me at YouTube http://www.youtube.com/user/nessya79

-THE END-

To the restaurant

          My husband and I are having problems controlling our autistic son everytime we bring him to public places such as restaurant or supermarket. Talk about eating in the restaurant give us more stressful than we could imagine. Dropping glass and plate, hitting plate with spoon continually, sudden screaming shrill, rolling on the floor, pulling other people's clothes .. and bla bla...This seems common for us. Embarrassing at 1st, but now we get used to it though ..;)...This video turns out to be emotional, I love the reactions of the public toward autism kids...Watch this, you might caught on tape one day....:D..

     
          We figure out many solutions to control Sean's hyperactive behavior, including buy new toys at nearby shop, it works! But only for the first few minutes, very frustrated. All we have to do is just to get his attention, sounds easy, but it's not, really. Even my parents and my in-laws complained that they never saw a child so active before, in other word, naughty boy...hahaha...sean ohh sean, you make the eldest headache looorrr!! But somehow, we manage to get rid of it, we stand by his favorite snack every time we go out. He enjoys it very much. We also bought galaxy tab and download many games, songs, cartoons etc. He likes it so much, especially the solving puzzle part. Watch these videos...click and below attached vid

-THE END-

Sean and his biscuit crackers

        It's been a long time since my autistic son, Sean, didn't eat rice. He just refuse to change his daily menu, this is call sameness. He only eats crunchy food which makes cracking sound in his mouth, such as biscuit crackers or 'keropok'/snack. Of course we don't encourage our kids to eat 'keropok', it's not healthy anyway. So, we bought this crackers for him as his daily meal. Worry about his balance nutrition, we also give him multivitamin. I've tried give him rice and noodles, he spit it out, and this makes me furious sometimes. But I won't give up though. It's no point forcing him to eat anyway. But thank God, he loves to drink milk, 5 to 6 times a day...;)....

All types of biscuit crackers

Crackers anywhere, anytime

Posing with his new cap and his favorite crackers

        Everyday, I'll prepare his 3 meals. Hoping that one day miracle happens. It did happened!!..It was on Sunday night, 15/7/2012, when 4 of us, myself, hubby, Sean and Shenna went out for dinner at nearby cafe. Sean is always sitting between me and hubby, have to. Suddenly he grabbed my hand and pushed me to a bowl of rice. I was wondering what could that mean, "Sean, you want to eat rice?" I asked. As usual, no word and expression from him. I was guessing, probably he wants to eat rice. I was right though. He ate 2 bowls of rice. We were so happy, thought that our Sean is back. The next day I cooked special rice for him, but so frustrated, he refuse to eat. I have to try harder...jia you!!!!


-THE END-

Autism Song (lyrics)

        How do u like autism songs? There is one song I really love, it calls "Don't Give Up On Me".. Watch the video at YouTube here. My tears fall down every time I listen to this song. So touching, really. Even my son , Sean, also likes it, this song just makes him feel calm, relax and comfortable. This song is written by Victoria Boland and her mother, Viga Boland, for the Canadian National Autism Association, and sung by Victoria Boland. Lovely. Here's the lyrics.






 


DON'T GIVE UP ON ME (AUTISM SONG) 


Verse 1: 
It's so hard for me to say "I love you" 
The words just don't come out the way they should 
And I know you don't believe me, when I'm being so bad 
That I'm trying so hard to be good 


Pre-chorus: 
And at those times when you reach for me 
And I push you away 
Deep inside I just want you to stay, 'cause... 


CHORUS: 
You're the light in my dark, the current in my stream 
My sun when it's raining and drowning all my dreams 
Without you, I can't make it ... so don't give up on me 
There's a whole lot of love inside the person you can't see. 


Verse 2: 
I wish I could say how much I need you 
I want to show how much I love your smiling face 
But something deep inside keeps holding me back 
And I'm lost in my own little space 


Pre-chorus to chorus to bridge: 
Forgive me if I'm screaming...I'm desperate to show you 
Who I really am, I just wanna know you....'cause 


CHORUS: 
You're the light in my dark, the current in my stream 
My sun when it's raining and drowning all my dreams 
Without you, I can't make it ... so don't give up on me 
There's a whole lot of love inside the person you can't see. 


 -THE END-

My Son Autism Spectrum Disorder's (ASD's) Symptoms

        My son, Sean, was diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder (ASD), he is now 2 years 6 months old. Please read my previous post here. Sean ASD's symptoms including; 

• Delay in speech - no meaningful words, he pulls our hands if he needs something 
• Less eye contact - avoid eye contact when we talk to him 
• Appears to be deaf at times - ignores when call him by his name 
• Hyperactive - never sits still even for a second 
• Hand or arm flapping - repetitive movement 
• Body spinning with black eyes roll to the corner of the eyes 
• Rolling eyes, looking at things from the corners of the eyes 
• Head-shaking to the left and right repeatedly 
• Headbanging on walls or floors or headbutting people 
• Lining up objects/toys - the same shapes or colors
• Frequently walking on tiptoes 
• No fear of strangers 
• Obviously large head size in comparison to body 
• Does not point or otherwise gesture for object 
• Difficulty with transitions and/or new things 
• Shows sensory issues to texture such as blankets, clothes, pillow 
• Show sensory issues by chewing objects such as pacifier, paper, clothes, rubber, plastics etc 
• Licking on cold surface such as soft drink can, steel etc 
• Licking on his own body (arm) when apply soup while bathing 
• Obsession towards spinning objects such as wheel, fan 
• Insists on sameness or resistant to change - refuse to change his daily meal, only eat crunchy food with cracking sound in his mouth such as, biscuit crackers, keropok. 
• Excessive laughing for no apparent reason - suddenly laugh so hard for no reason 
• Continued resistance to toilet training 
• Makes frequent loud noises or shrills and chirps 
• Wringing of hands or rocking behavior 

        According to today's research, people believe that Autism affects boys 3 to 4 times more often than girls. Here are some Autism Spectrum Disorder checklist warning for your little one ---> http://recoveredfromautism.blogspot.com/2007/05/autism-spectrum-disorder-warning-signs.html


-The End-

My Son's diagnosis of Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD)

“I am different, not less. ” ― Temple Grandin, Dr. Grandin is a noted autistic who is an author, speaker, cited expert in many publications, and video producer.

        My son, Sean Bruce Pau was born on 26th January 2010 at 1:12pm, place of birth = Kuching Specialist, weight at birth = 3.24kg, length at birth =51cm, head circumference = 33.5cm. Doctors said he was a healthy normal baby at birth and we were so happy for him. I fell in love with him the first time I saw him. No! Should have fallen for him when I carried him in my womb...;) .. Sean is an active little baby; he likes to smile, kick his legs and tries to get up when he sees us walking around. His hobby? Naturally he loves to drink milk. I remember during my confinement, I used to wake up several times at night just to breastfeed him. This makes him grows up pretty fast, and I will not forget that moment. He seems so normal, so perfect to me, just like any other normal kid. We never suspected him to have any disorder.

        As time goes by, at the age of 1, Sean still couldn’t walk and talk. Not a single word like, mamam, mama, papa, bobom..etc. All he knew was just to cry out or scream if he wants something. This kind of worried me a bit, and when I talk to my mom, she said that he is only 1 year old, "...just give him more time," she said.

        At the age of 1 year and 2 months, he could finally stand up on his own without holding/hanging on anything. We are very happy especially his elder sister, Shenna. Finally she has a companion to play with. At the age of 1 year 5 months, he passes his 'walking exam'. Finally he could walk and run by himself, and we had a 'great time' chasing him around. He is very active and is unable to sit still even for a while. He likes to flap his hands repeatedly and walk tip-toeing every time he gets excited or happy. He has this strange obsession to spinning objects, especially wheels, any wheels as long as it spins, such as toy car's wheel, bicycle's wheel and etc. He could stay a long period of time spinning the wheel. Other than that, he likes to spin his body, repeatedly, with his black eyes rolled to the corner of his eyes. Or he'll shake his head to the left and right, repeatedly. I don't understand why, and all the while i thought it was normal behaviour. There is one thing that bothered me the most, and that is he likes to scream and roll his body on the floor whenever he gets angry or upset. I thought this is normal too as I have seen some kids acting like this, so we didn't take too much notice of it. But still, no words from him.

Obsession toward spinning objects 

        On November 2011, the three of us (myself, Shenna and Sean) went back to Kuching for a holiday, and hubby was left behind as he needs to work. At that time, Sean was 1 year and 10 months. He still couldn't talk, still very active and aggressive... but this time a bit different. He would show his anger by banging his head on the floor or wall, followed by rolling his body on the floor, with both legs kicking. I feel miserable when I saw bruises on his head, and I’m so worried about him. Then I began to realise that whenever I called him by his name, he shows no response. Less eye contact, and sometimes none at all. His behaviour is getting worse especially when he is angry or upset, I can’t bring him anywhere by myself because I can’t control his behaviour, and this really stressed me, making me feel really tired.

        Back in Bintulu, he has his check up at the age of 2. The nurse examined him by calling his name. The same thing happened, still no respond. He still couldn't talk. The nurse suggests me to see a Paediatric Specialist. Normally kids will be able to form 2 words at the age of 2. I wasn’t very worried that time because I still don’t know what autism is. I thought he was just a bit late in his speech and should be fine after some time. We made an appointment with a Paediatric Doctor at General Hospital Bintulu. It was on 7th March 2012, when we received the first word from the doctor. Sean has "AUTISM". But he still cannot confirm it yet because Sean is still very young, and he needs further assessment. On the examination, the doctor stated Sean as;

1. Likely Autism/Asperger Spectrum Disorder.
2. Active, brief eye contact.
3. Communication

• Speech – only sounds or screams, no meaningful words.
• Non-verbal – minimal
• Social interaction – no shared emotions.

4. Play – repetitive play (play with wheels by spinning it repetitively), no imaginative play.

        I was speechless, hoping that they might be wrong about Sean. The doctor said, firstly, Sean has to go for audiology test in Sibu, to check whether his ear is in good condition. But I am positive that he is not deaf. The doctor explained that he is definitely not deaf, but he might not be able to hear clearly. The audiology test is on 12th July 2012, and another appointment at Clinic PERPIKAT Bintulu on 3rd July 2012.

        On the way back, we were very silent in the car. Sean was asleep, and my hubby didn’t say a word but I know he was thinking about our little boy. Obviously he was just as worried as I was. Back home, I made a lot of research about autism, studied about it, read articles about people in history who were diagnosed with it. We also bought a lot of toys for Sean to develop his brain, mostly puzzle type, cube blocks with alphabet letter on it, Lego (built) and toy cars (big and small).

        Autism is a disorder of neural development characterized by impaired social interaction and communication, and by restricted and repetitive behaviour. For more info about autism, please follow this link Autism and Autism Spectrum

        One month later, Sean still plays with his toy car’s wheel by spinning it over and over. Sometimes he rides on it..:D... There’s a change in Sean’s playing pattern. He begins to arrange his toy cars in one straight line...even the blocks and Lego which he arranges one straight line. I was surprise at first, since nobody taught him of this before. Actually, his behaviour worried me, because I knew this is one of autism’s symptoms, which is called Compulsive Behaviour, i.e. intended and appears to follow rules, such as arranging objects in stacks or lines. I was depressed and so stressed, crying in my heart, recalling back what I had done wrong, blaming myself for being careless, couldn’t sleep at night, worried about Sean, worried about his future. I know I have to be strong, I pray to God to help me to think positively, to make me stronger. I will never give up on you, son.

Arranging objects in line

        On 3rd July, 2012, it was Sean's 1st appointment at Clinic PERPIKAT Bintulu, he is diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD). Sean needs to follow up training there. Earlier awareness and training might help him become better in the future. We are doing our best for him, and Sean is doing his best so far. He is a smart boy.

        We took him for an Audiology Test on 12th July, 2012 at General Hospital Sibu. There are 2 parts for the test, which is the outer and inner part of his ear. Sean passed the outer part. The results for the inner part, was not accurate, maybe because Sean was having a flu. There is also another method to test the inner part of the ear, but when they tried to test him on his forehead, he suddenly woke up and they couldn't give him another sleeping dose, of course. The session had to be postponed to another appointment, which is 18 September, 2012. Hope everything is going to be alright. We are hopeful for the future, waiting for his test this coming September.

Sean on Audiology Test at Sibu

“You're a puzzling boy that leaves us a million questions, your sudden screams/laughter which we don't understand. You act in your own way, making me think, 'am i a failure as a mom?'...I begin to think back what went wrong, while trying not to scare myself coz I need to be strong...but please tell me how to reach your little heart...” – mom.


-The End-